BY POPULAR REQUEST…

Vince McMahon (From 20 Years Ago): Miss Aretha Franklin
Aretha Franklin: I stills gots it!

JR: By gawd! Slobbernocker! Money in the Bank is Opening the Show!
ALL 8 GUYS: Oooo…shiinnyy…
Randy Orton: What is that up there?
Fit Finlay: Quick, everyone keep beating the crap out of Orton!
Randy Orton: But what is i…. ::Randy Orton gets destroyed from here on out::
Matt Hardy: Edge… you took my girlfriend of four years
Edge: Oh yeah… well… you stole my stamp collection!
Randy Orton: Hey guys! What is that thing up there?
Edge: Who told you could talk ::Edge takes out everyone::
Matt Hardy: Edge, you should just drop dead!
Jeff Hardy: What a splendid idea!
::Edge gets damn near killed as they set Edge on a ladder in … fuck it, just YouTube it::
Randy Orton: Alright! Okay… now what is that thing up there?
Finlay: I love to fight! ::Gets RKO’d::
Randy Orton: Dammit! I can’t see it! What is that contraption up there?!
Kennedy: MIIISSSTTTERRR!!! ::Gets RKO’d::
Randy Orton: Hey! What do you know?! Its the ceiling! Phew… mystery solved
CM Punk: Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
King Booker: Why, its humourous elementary. Good day… SUCKA!
Matt Hardy: Hey look Booker! I got your woman
King Booker: Listen sunshine, I shalt not put up with such shenanigans. FOO!
Kennedy: Miiiissssttterrrr Keennn
Little Bastard: Dammit! I think I am going to need a stepladder once I get up there!
Kennedy: Hey little midget… TIME TO DIE!
::Little Bastard pretty much gets killed off of the ladder::
Kennedy: Okay… it is now time to say… MMIIIIISSSSTTEER KENNNEEEEDY! KENNEDY! MMOOONNNEEEY IN THE BAAANK! BANK!
::Kennedy wins::

Great Khali: Hskjsojksjw didkfjdd I Gekjket Okksjfsn Wrsfessdftlesfmsfdansijija?
Kane: I don’t fucking know… but meet your fate… RUUSSSTTYY HOOOOK!
Great Khali: Njskdfjoo!
::Great Khali wins::
 
Eugene: I can’t believe I’m fucking bald. Hey…. when I am going to get out of this damn gimmick, and why the hell is my jacket still green?
JT: Yo Yo Yo!
Chad: YO!
Extreme Expose: We can’t dance. But we can suck dick!
Mae Young & Fabulous Moolah: But we can dance! … and we can administer a gummer!
Slick: She was called Minnie the Moocher! Saying Hidey Hidey Hidey Ho!
Dusty Rhodes: wii ’bout ta git buzi!
Sgt. Slaughter: Sliime! Maaggoot!
Gerald Brisco: Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop!
Jimmy Hart: Can someone blow on my megaphone?
IRS: I’m here for the gang bang and your money…
Ricky Steamboat: Time to make the smarks cum in their pants
DAMN!:: DAMN!

Chrs Benoit: I can’t believe I got MVP this year. This match is gonna blow!
MVP:  I reset your implications! For that! We shall have a good match!
Chris Benoit: Sweet!
::Chris Benoit wins::

Donald Trump: Momma don’t ya make me another meatloaf, forget the Mac ‘n’ Cheese.I want some fun piled on a bun
Boogeyman: I’m the Boogeyman! Worms! Boo!
Former Miss USA: AHH!
Donald Trump: I want my manwich please!

Undertaker: Lots of smoke… $5,000. Many chanting men in robes waving torches… $6,000. Walking down the aisle at Wrestlemania… motherfucking priceless!
Batista: Hey Taker! Can I win tonight?
Undertaker: Umm… no
::Undertaker wins and is the NNEEEWWW World Heavyweight Champion!::

Stephanie McMahon: Hey Vince, this is my baby…
Vince McMahon: Here’s JOHNNY!

The Sandman: I got on Wrestlemania!
Tommy Dreamer: I know!
Sabu: …
RVD: Yeah, its pretty cool…
Elijah Burke: Wicked!
Marcus Con Vor: Seriously, you guys couldn’t up with a better name than Marcus Con Vor?!
Elijah Burke: And what? Monty Brown is any better
Marcus Con Vor: Touché motherfucker;
Kevin Thorn: Could be worse… you could be stuck with a lame gimmick!
Matt Striker:  Hey! Guys match! Am I the only guy that knows we’re working?!
RVD: Apparently
::ECW Originals win::

Barber Chair: Sweet! I get my own entrance!
Crowd: HURRAY! BARBER POLE!
Vince McMahon: Donny… its time that we settle this mano a mano… VICARIOUSLY THROUGH TWO OTHER GUYS!
Donald Trump: Sounds good
Shriveled Up Monkey Penis: Grr…
Lashley: I can’t wait to do my thang!
Stone Cold: WHAT!
Donald Trump: Go Lindsey!
Shriveled Up Monkey Penis:  Grrr… die Stone Cold!
Shane o Mac: Van Terminator! Baby!
Stone Cold: WHAT! ::Gives Umaga the stunner::
::Lashley wins::
JR: STONE COLD! STONE COLD! STONE COLD! HAS JUST WON AT WRESTLEMANIA!
Vince McMahon: Awww… shit
::Vince gets shaved bald::
Donald Trump: Ha ha! I’m not bald
Stone Cold: Shut up!
::Stone Cold gives Trump the Stunner::

Melina: Wow… so many asses to kill… so little time!
Ashley: Thank god Father Mulcahy gave me my last rites back stage…
::Melina wins::

HBK: Its Wrestlemania time, baby!
Crowd: Yay!
John Cena: Like my car I obviously didn’t drive?
Crowd: Booo!
John Cena:  Have you
Crowd: Booo!
John Cena: ever
Crowd: Booo!
John Cena: get the feeling of
Crowd: Booo!
John Cena: deja vu?
HBK: Yeah
Crowd: YAY!
HBK: What can I say? They either really like me or really fucking hate you
John Cena: Well, the writers don’t see any reason to give you the win. I mean, they had an original plan for someone else to take the title off of me this year
Triple H: Dammit… stupid leg…
HBK: But hey, lets have match of the year anyway
::Cena wins::
Crowd: Booo! Great match! But still… Booo!
John Cena: Dammit! Now I have to spend 2 months regaining my heat after Wrestlemania… AGAIN!

• Totally exceeded my expectations! Still not the greatest Wrestlemania, but it at least won’t go down as a bad one or even a mediocre one (like last year). This will go down in the solid category.     

• Undertaker/Batista is the match that surprised me. Batista was saying in interviews earlier in the that they were going to try to steal the show. I wouldn’t go that far but it was a great match!
• Chris Benoit & MVP totally shocked me. We all know that Benoit can wrestle a broomstick to a great match, but MVP himself pulled out all of the stops. I wish they gave it more than 10 minutes as they had some mojo going on. I would like to see a rematch.
• Kane/Khali sucked and sadly this still was Khali’s like 2nd best match behind his match with The Undertaker.
• Money in the Bank was great. I was sad that Shelton wasn’t in it going in, but this match totally exceeded my expectations. Also, great winner and thankfully they beat Edge’s streak… which is good. We don’t need two wrestlers that absolutely can not lose every damn year! Booking one is hard enough!
• The Cryme Tyme skit was great. Loved all the wonderful totally unexpected cameos such as The Slick! Jimmy Hart! Ricky the Dragon Steamboat! OMGWTFBBQ!
• Melina/Ashley’s ending was retarded. I’m sorry, but Ashley should have won.
• The ECW match was what it was. Too many wrestlers. Not enough time. Matt Striker goes down as the most valuable player in that match.
• The Battle of the Billionaires was entertaining crap. I expected a longer match, but we got what we expected (I probably expected a better match than the majority).