John Cena: I beat Khali last night.
Vince: I lost last night! I am AAANNNGGGAAARRRRRYYYYYY!!! BUGH! BUGH! BUGH!
John Cena: Uhhh… yeah…
Vince: That’s it! Tonight, you face Khali and Umaga!
John Cena: Ohhh… fuck me!
Random Girl In Audience: With pleasure!

Cryme Tyme: Yay! We are alive, and we have ourselves one of the hot WWE Bee-tches. We will be tapping that shit after the show.
Candice Michelle: I knew I had a reason for that pepper spray!
Kenny Dyksta: Hey Bret. Why are we a team?
Johnny Nitro: I think they drew your name out of a hat, Owen. We will soon be the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be.
Kenny Dykstra:  Okay… well, I am not a nugget.
Melina: Uhhh… What is up with you guys?
::Cryme Tyme & Candice Michelle win!::

Maria: Santino, you have a belt. It is shiny. Like my boobs!
Santino: Why yes, Maria.
Vince: I WANT A BELT! Sure, I may own the WWE and I wear a WWE Title when I make love to my mistre… err…. wife.  SO, I WANT A BELT!
Maria: Uhhh…
Vince: SHUT UP, BITCH!
Santino: Hey, you don’t talk to a lady like that.
Vince: Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get! Get!
Stagehand: Hey Vince, your needle is stuck…

Santino: Okay, who will I face? Chris Masters again?
Chris Masters: YES!!! …and what’s so wrong with me?
Santino: Uhhh… this
::Santino wins::
Santino: I WIN AGAIN!
Chris Masters: Damn! Stupid pointless burial!

Hardy Boyz: Hi, new friends! You haven’t turned on us yet!
Rednecks: Hey, since we’ve been pretending to be your friends, when are we getting our title shot already?
Vince: HOW ABOUT TONIGHT?
Redneck: We will pretend to be disappointed because we wanted to beat them when they are 100%, but we are really laughing on the inside!
Ric Flair: Wooo!
Vince: I hate seeing Older Men with Younger Women
Torrie: Uhhh…. what about you with Trish Stratus… Sable…. Candice Michelle…
Vince: Shut up!
Torrie: Me…. Dawn Marie… Stacy Keibler… Jackie Gayda
Vince: I SAID SHUT UP! That’s it! You face Carlito tonight
Ric Flair: Oh yeah, that’s fucking fair!
Vince: You face Randy Orton! Sure, Orton may have hade a tough match with Rob Van Dam, but it will appear as a punishment. Now that’s logic!

Randy Orton: Damn, I am sore!
Ric Flair: Woooo!
Randy Orton: But, you know what! Its time to open up a can of Ass Randy!
Ric Flair: Ass Randy? That… that doesn’t even make sense…
Randy Orton: Your fish doesn’t make sense!
::Randy Orton wins::

Carlito: Torrie, I don’t want to hurt you.
Torrie: Oh… okay, I will take your word for it.
Audience:: Don’t trust him! He has an afro!
Carlito: HA! I LIED!
::Carlito wins::

Hardy Boyz: Owww… we’re sore…
Rednecks: We’re reluctantly fighting you! However, if we REALLY reluctant, we’d lay down!
::The winners and NNNNEEEEEEWWWW World Tag Team Champions, Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch!::
Jeff Hardy: Hey, my foot was on the rope.
Matt Hardy: Hey buddies, Jeff’s foot was on the rope.
Trevor Murdoch: Oh…. it was?
Lance Cade: Well… remember how we said we were your friends?
Hardy Boyz: Yeah?
Trevor Murdoch: PSYCHE!
::The Rednecks turn on The Hardyz::
Hardy Boyz: AHHH! How could you? We just didn’t see this coming?! We thought we were friends!

Coach: Next week! We will have VINCE McMAHON APPRECIATION NIGHT! Just like it is every episode of RAW.

Great Khali: Imjjj wankjkj thkjkjkjse belkjkjt!
Shriveled Monkey Penis: Grr….
John Cena: Well, aside from the groupie I just shagged, this night is going to suck! I mean, its like I am facing Andre the Giant & Haku with less cooler guys.
Great Khali:  Iioerwo adsjfm nodkfljkdit lesnmns cookjjkbl!
Shriveled Monkey Penis: I am too much cooler than Haku! Oh… sorry, I mean GRRRR!
::John Cena wins::
JR: By gawd! Boomer sooner! Two dollar steaks John Cena lifted the Great Khali! Draft next week! BBQ SAUCE!

• Well… this was more a pointless week. The only real development was the TOTALLY UNEXPECTED TWIST that Murdoch & Cade were in on it all along! OH MY! Draft is next week. We will have to see what happens!

RJ45