Maria: Kitty cat!
Mickie James: I’m a hot Native-American!
Torrie Wilson: FOOTBALL!
Victoria: Sumo? Fucking sumo? I don’t know what’s worse, wrestling in my lingerie or wrestling in this!
Layla: Bad Cop!
Kelly Kelly: Gangsta! Surprising, this isn’t much different from my usual attire!
Brooke: Jane from Tarzan!
Melina: Las Vegas Showgirl!
Jillian: Britney! See my babies falling. And you know, in current news, Britney had her babies taken away from her. GET IT! GET IT?!
Michelle McCool: Wait for me guys! I’m Eve!
::Kelly Kelly wins::
Beth Phoenix: Do you know who I am? I’m the GLAMAZON, biyotch!! Read the rest of this entry »

Kennedy: What the fuck, how did I get here in the middle of the ring? Well, thank god because that last place I was at was absolutely horrible…
:: Kennedy begins to flash back ::
:: Kennedy’s flash back begins when he wakes up in a dark room with a weird contraption around his neck ::
Kennedy: WHAT THE FUCK?! What kind of a fucking rib is this? Where is JBL? I’ll kick his ass!
:: A clown puppet appears on a television ::
Clown Puppet on TV: Hello Kennedy, I want to play a game…
:: End Flashback ::
Kennedy: Anyway… shiit… I have a microphone. Hey, vote for me this Sunday!
Jeff Hardy: NO! VOTE FOR ME!
Randy Orton: VOTE FOR ME!
HBK: Hey dipshit, you’re already in the match!

Brian Kendrick: WOO!
Paul London: WOO!
Mickie James: Hey guys, wait for me!
Trevor Murdoch: I love cheese!
Lance Cade: I love swiss cheese!
Melina: I love wrestling… even if I am not good at it!
:: Kendrick/London/Mickie win! ::
Mickie James: Wait, I won? I am so confused! What the hell? Guys! What happened? OMG! OLOLOL!!!!1eleventy-one.

Read the rest of this entry »

WWE: We are in Jolly Ole’ England!

Last Week: Skinner came back to seek vengeance on Randy Orton.

Randy Orton: Hey!
William Regal: HEY!
Randy Orton: I want my three potential opponents to fight each other TONIGHT in Jolly Ole’ England!
William Regal: I will think about it. Read the rest of this entry »

Mr. McMahon: Last night history was made!
Last Night: OVERKILL!
Triple H: Oh, SHUT UP! I want a rematch!
Mr. McMahon: You got it… BUT… it will have a twist!
Triple H: :: sighs :: Handicap match…
Mr. McMahon: A HANDICAP MATCH! And you will never guess Randy Orton’s tag team partner!
Triple H: :: sighs again :: Umaga…
Mr. McMahon: UMAGA! Read the rest of this entry »

3 Jobbers: We are all pasty white!
Mr. McMahon: Watch this video complete with music stolen right out of a mideviel movie!
Mideivel Video: Last Week, stuff happened.
Mr. McMahon: These 3 jobbers all have unique fighting styles but DON’T HAVE NAMES!
3 Jobbers: We fight!
Mr. McMahon: Nah… you see, its been 30 days since I suspended half of the roster due to them getting into the candy dish backstage. So, time to cram them all tonight… first with… OOH-MANGA!
Ooh-Manga: Grrrr! Read the rest of this entry »